Charmer...

Dear Readers,

Welcome to my blog. My name is David. A typical Indian with just an ordinary background and a moron for a friend (The Giant).

(All names and characters in this blog have been modified to avoid any harm to the originals users, which may or may not rise in the process of its making. Any retaliations or frustration which may rise, can be directed to the afore-mentioned title holders or THE GIANT)

Like many, you may be wondering why I call my friend a moron. Not much of a story. The only fact is that I am jealous. His love life blooms but mine, ehrmm.. Is still under progress. Its clicks for him, ehrmm,.. Mine is still in process.  And more than that his friends stand in awe, cheer him on.

Like many telemarketers from the bank, when they sell you their product, they say “sir, you can have 10 times your salary, and the interest rate is just 6% or 5%” “OOK, what is the diminishing rate then???” Maybe if you understand the terminology or lucky enough or if have a good ear, then you can hear a small rat squeaking from the other end “sir, its… .14% or 23%”. That’s my cue to cut the phone.

But the same can’t be applied in this guys life. Nobody is cutting his line, or neither does he cut their line (even after hearing their age which could be double his age .It could be his teacher, his.. so on and on).The line is never ending. But for me, I can proudly say.. .. .. it’s in process.

My first crush didn’t even know I existed in the beginning.  Every Friday, I get in the bus to go to church for the Sunday school (I wonder, why it’s called a Sunday school even though it’s happening on a Friday), and as per the religious terms, the mind is supposed to be free of all malice, hatred, sexual impulse, dirty thoughts, idolatry, adultery etc (oh lalala)... and here I am thinking of this lady 17/7. (Sorry readers, the rest of the hours are censored due to graphic nudity and explicit images which are displayed during the sleep hours.)  And what came of that love? It started and ended in a couple of weeks after due frustrations and explicit slaps from this old hag. Instead of rejecting my proposal in a more appropriate manner or saying that she’s too old for me, she had to vent her frustration on me… I had to console myself and assure that it must have been a ladies problem which occur every month of the year.

Moral of this blog:- Never ask a lady out or propose to her when she is PMSing. If you can’t figure it out, then you most probably must be in the receiving end.